Dawn of the Dead

It's only a matter of time. Danny Boyle gave us a taste of it in 28 Days Later, Simon Pegg and his Winchester cronies saved the day in Shaun Of The Dead, and Will Smith bust his ass trying to save the world in I Am Legend. The zombie holocaust is a coming folks, and when it hits Birmingham, you'll need to be prepared.

Training

Don't bother with Karate or Ju-Jitsu, there's a new kid on the martial arts block – Krav Maga, an Israeli hand-to-hand combat system used to train the army, police and civilians all over the world.

Sounds like the perfect way to smack up a few zombies. Birmingham classes are held throughout the week but the basic class is on Tuesdays at Stevie B's Gym (Acocks Green, B27 6DN). Contact Steve Maycock for more info: 07956 595244.

Essential Supplies: Spikes and Studs

Once you've mastered the art of Krav Maga, you'll need to stock up on essential supplies. No self-respecting zombie-assassinating-hero would be without his trusty trucker cap and big beefy goth boots to embed into soggy un-dead skulls, so head down to the Oasis Markets (112-113 Corporation Street, (0121) 710 5439).

For the ultimate hardcore punk/metal zombie-slaying soundtrack (because ALL great zombie films have great soundtracks), go to Tempest Records (83 Bull Street, B4 6AB (0121) 236 9170).

Looting

Someone's gotta look after all those LCD and plasma TVs in the Bang & Olufsen store at the prestigious Mailbox complex (53 Wharfside Street, B1 1RE (0121) 632 6166), and you're obviously the best person for the job.

With a website and shop layout that screams luxurious sophistication it's only right that someone as highly sophisticated and responsible as you would give the BeoSystem 3 and BeoVision 4 a loving home. Don't forget to pop into Emporio Armani (The Mailbox, 2/4 Wharfside Street, B1 1RD (0121) 632 1150) to grab that £500 suit for the acceptance speech of your 'I Saved The World From The Un-dead' award.

The Aftermath

The city has fallen, lost to a sea of destruction and ruin; and all you can do is sit tight and wait for the Americans to come and sort the whole mess out ('cause that's what they do, aint it?). Squashed up against hundreds of sweaty and exhausted survivors with only hardcore drum 'n' bass beats and cheap booze to ease the pain, you'll jump up and praise the Lord in the former church-come-recently-reopened-club Que Club (212 Corporation Street, B4 6QB (0121) 212 1212).

TL

Email to a friend

Post a comment

Site Map

itchy Bath | itchy Birmingham | itchy Brighton | itchy Bristol | itchy Cambridge | itchy Cardiff | itchy City | itchy Edinburgh | itchy Glasgow | itchy Leeds | itchy Liverpool | itchy London | itchy Manchester | itchy Nottingham | itchy Oxford | itchy Sheffield | itchy York |

© Copyright Itchy PLC. All Rights Reserved. | Contact us | Advertise

Web and Content Management System design by Horisk, Scotland UK | Graphic Design by Evoluted